Self Love and Compassion
How to embrace self love and compassion
How do I embrace and tap into self love this year?
When we are struggling, many of us jump to creating affirmations and a laundry list of things to change. Often this list is overwhelming and doesn’t evoke motivation.
Also, the laundry list and focusing on what is “wrong” with us gives the message that we aren’t enough. What would it feel like to embrace who we are and show curiosity for why we behave and feel the way we do? What if we let go of “new year, new me” and examine why we want to leave parts of ourselves behind.
Maybe you want to get a handle on your eating habits and stop procrastinating. Instead of setting high expectations that are difficult to reach and quantify, we can do the following
Identify your values. How do you hope to show up in the world? What matters to you? Maybe you want more intimacy and honesty in your relationships. Maybe you deeply desire safety and control.
What values are you living in right now? Finally, exploring your values and identifying how you can live a values-based life can change your life.
Journal about what you enjoy about the present moment and what you want the future to look like. Often, we are so focused on what we want to change that we don’t celebrate what is going right. Write about what you have! Tapping into gratitude is incredibly impactful and reduces suffering.
Allowing yourself to take in the present and accept where you are changes the lens you use to view our life. What do you want to add to your life? What will make it even more full? Paint a picture of what you want to add to your life through journaling.
Show curiosity for why you do the behavior you want to change. What if we explore the parts of ourselves that drive us to stop working? Why is it that our bodies and minds want us to stop and rest?
Often, our behavior is driven by a need. What need is this behavior trying to meet? Is this behavior meant to soothe or allow us to rest?
Why am I so drained?
These past couple of years have been rough for most of us. Honestly, I am still processing 2020!
Some of us have experienced loss and illness. Others have experienced financial instability and grief.
Our nervous systems, body, and minds have been afflicted by stress and grief. Yes, stress and grief tire our body, mind, and nervous system! Luckily, there are ways to heal from these past couple of years and embrace self compassion.
You are not alone in this! We are drained and are in need of rest and nourishment.
Am I procrastinating because I am drained?
Often, procrastination and lack of action sets in when we are depleted. We need to feed ourselves and obtain energy to do anything in our lives.
I like to think of us as plants. When we take in nutrients and sun we are able to grow and thrive. However, when we cut off our nutrients we wilt and tire.
This pandemic depleted and sucked the energy out of many of us. Perhaps, embracing our exhaustion and allowing ourselves to rest by doing activities that feed us is the answer.
Tapping into self love and healing with a therapist can make you thrive again.
In what ways can I show myself self love and compassion this year?
Schedule time to rest and enjoy life. Often, we are chasing the next goal and moving so quickly that we fail to stop and rest. Pick a time to do an activity that gives you energy and enjoyment. Put it in your calendar and bake it into your routine.
Listen to and move your body in a way that feels good. Usually, we are disconnected from our body and unaware when it is tense. Tuning into our body, moving it the way it wants to move, and releasing tension can make a huge difference on our mental health.
Talk to yourself like you would a friend and challenge negative thoughts. Honestly, sometimes I talk to myself in ways that I would never talk to my friends. Shifting our self talk towards compassion can change our brain.
All of us have a lens that we use to see the world, others, and ourselves. Some have rose colored glasses while others have dark glasses that view themselves in a negative light.
Realizing that our thoughts are being warped by this lens makes all the difference. Challenging our negative, self-defeating thoughts can change our lens over time. Eventually, we can form a lens that sees the world, others, and ourselves in a different light.
Move towards acceptance while hoping for change. Sometimes, we are so focused on what is wrong in our life that we view our life and ourselves as unacceptable. However, accepting where we are and embracing our present selves allows us to grow and heal.
We can accept where we are while making steps to change at the same time! Embracing who we are gives us the energy and strength to walk towards a life that is is in alignment with our values.
growgood psychology has a team of therapists that are dedicated to support you along your journey to wellbeing
To add, at growgood psychology we will create a safe holding space for you to build self love and compassion. We will help you acquire the skills that will support you in creating a fulfilling life. At growgood psychology you can learn to live a values-based life and achieve inner peace.
Finally, connect with us now to begin the healing process and embrace growth with our DBT therapists!